About Me

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05.05.1993
Just an average girl.
Don't judge me if you don't know me.

Friday, May 1, 2015

I'M BACK

OMG HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII GUYS I'M FINALLY BACK BLOGGING AFTER NINE MONTHS!!
Reason being, I remembered my login password which I thought I forgotten months back and was busy with life and school so gave blogging a missed. But now that I've got the motivation to do so again, here I am!^^
The past 9 months I would say.... was pretty tough for me. Been through a roller coaster ride. For those who are followers on my Twitter or Ig then you should probably remember that I went through a really painful break up last year November. Those days were really tough to spent through especially with school work giving more pressure. Crying all day everyday was what I can only do back then but thankful enough to have really good friends around, accompanying me almost everyday and not forgetting my sister.
A trip to Korea was planned on December last year to somehow "heal" myself and for some fresh air and yes, I did felt so much better after the trip. I no longer cry over the things I've lost and not much of pain left to be felt at that point of time. So I really want to thank all of them for the effort made to make me feel better and happier once again:)

Two months after the break up, we patched things up and are still together now. I wouldn't dare to say that we are stronger than before because initially that was what I thought, at first. But as time goes by, nah, I don't think so. To be honest, sometimes I do question myself if my decision was right but what's done cannot be undone right so just gotta live with it. It's not that there's no love anymore but things changed, people changed, everything feels different now including the way you talk/treat me. Call me a sensitive bitch I don't care but I am happy to be sensitive so that I can actually spot that something is amiss at once. I've not been genuinely happy for awhile, there is so much that you made me feel and I've got so much that I want to say but never will get the chance to do so because we always end up with nothing good so I try to keep it to myself. I thought... maybe you should try to listen to the voice screaming inside me, those are exactly how I am feeling. All I ever want is just fairness, appreciation, honesty and consistency which it's so hard to expect from you:(
At times I really feel that being friends will be so much better, at least I'll have your attention a little more than now, wouldn't have to go through all these painful path... really so much to say but perhaps not here, yet. I've never regret loving you but for not thinking hard and long enough before I allow myself to step into it.
People say, patching up either things get better or for the worst. Though I've somehow lose hope but not completely yet, deep down I still hope it's for the better. 

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