People often thinks that I'm the cheerful and happy go lucky type of girl... I won't deny that I am but at some point of time, I do have my own problems and emotions. Ever heard before:
"Behind every smile there is a frown. Behind every frown there is a story. Within that story there was a moment of sadness."
At times I really felt suffocated to be keeping everything inside me. For the past 20 years of my life, there were many ups and downs. Watching my love ones leave forever, one by one.. it breaks my heart whenever I think about it but what can be done? People will just tell you this is part and parcel of life and to accept the fact.
But the truth is no one knows exactly how it felt, how much pain to bear, how regretful it was, how much its gonna haunt you for the rest of your life.
Since young, my growing up stage till now was never a happy one. I watched my parents quarrel every single day over the slightest and stupidest thing, I've never experience what they called "family bond" ever since age 4+, I've A hating on B and mentioning B during every quarrel which annoyed me a lot, totally lose a very very important person in my life, suddenly and forever.
Life, friendship, relationship, family, work (in future)...all of these problems are giving me a hard time sometimes but at the same time, I'd rather keep it to myself because I hate it when it seems like I'm trying to draw people's attention, I hate it when people sympathize me when all I need is just someone who can truly understand what I'm facing and a good pair of listening ears.
So the best way is still to smile all your problems off and because I still prefer this way than to express everything out on my face.
In life, people are just gonna take you for granted when you're too nice and when you're not, they leave.
It's hard to please everyone. Is either you please others and get hurt yourself or be a total bitch and just protect yourself. This is how it works I guess.
Saw this quote and find it so damn true: " I always let it go, so he's always relaxed. Because I just let it happen and smile. It's ok I try not to think about it."
This happens when one gives in too much.
Ahhh whatever it is there's too much to say, this space isn't enough so I'm just gonna stop here.
You know I don't usually vent it here but just once in a while ok~
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